The Evolving Homemaker

Wow.  How on earth did this happen?  I don’t feel almost 40.  I don’t even feel 39.  And I think if most people looked at me they would not think I was 39.  Or maybe I am just fooling myself, maybe they actually do.   I feel as wise as 39 has earned me.  And I feel finally as if I am listening to myself, my own dreams, my own whispers.  Which I really, really, really like.

But my parents seemed WAY older at 40 than I feel.  Of course I was 7 then.  And I am not 40 yet.

A few weeks ago over at freeplaylife, Tiffany had us make our own superheroes.  Here is mine:

She is a bad ass. And totally reflects me.  Even down to the combat boots and pink hair.  As soon as I started to make her hair I said, “It needs to be pink.” And knew it.  I have always wanted pink hair.  That is the truth.  I was all giddy after she came to fruition and jumped on the treadmill to try to get my exercise for the day.

As I was walking/running, I thought to myself, “Why CAN’T I have pink hair?”  Really.  Why can’t I?

So I created a pink hair pin board.

And then I called my hairdresser who I hadn’t seen in 6 months due to intense time constraints.

And last Thursday I went to her.

And I have pink highlights.  And I want more.

I LOVE it.  And I have an appointment on the 16th of this month for more.  It is trial and error.  I can’t see it from the front, and i want to be able to.  I really wanted more of a statement.  This is the first time EVER I have dyed my hair any color at all.  And it feels pretty dang fun.  I have dreams of changing the color of the highlights whenever I feel the desire for a different whimsical color.

So there you have it.  My birthday present to myself for 39.  Wow.  Tomorrow I will let you know what I am beginning today for my own longevity.  39 and 2012 I am taking by the balls.  I am not jokin’ around in case anyone thought I was. This is serious.  My own life, happiness, and joy are on the line and I am not leaving it up to the ebbs and flows of daily life.

Nope.  I am exploring.  Writing. Experimenting.  Trying new things.  Deeply listening to my internal wanderings. Planning some mini family vacations.  Reading.  Getting playful.  Adding some spunk.  Trying not to take too many things too seriously.  Remembering the fragility of it all when I become a wee bit complacent. And just going for it.

Today is all we have, and I want to make the damn best of it.  And I also want to be cognizant of teaching my kids that they can give themselves permission to do the same; to live by their own rules.  We only have ourselves to reach for what is fulfilling to our own souls yearnings.  Why on earth do we sit around waiting for an invitation to do so?

Here is your invitation.  Get to work.  And have some fun.

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Last Saturday my husband took my son on a date.  They went to a monster truck show.  As fun as that sounded, not, a spa night at home with my little girl sounded like just the date I was after.

I sorta had another motive too, other than just planning a perfect spa night with my little gal.  I wanted to teach her something, something it has taken me almost 39 years to learn.  You’re worth it.  You’re worth it.  You’re worth it.

I have spent my whole life undervaluing my worth.  One of the lessons I am intent on teaching my kids is that they are valuable beyond belief, and they should never doubt it.  My daughter constantly asks for back scratches.  99% of the time I oblige and  scratch away.  The lesson I want her to take away is that she is worth it, that if it feels good to her she should ask for it, and that when she is looking for her life mate, if they are willing to scratch her back when she asks then she just might have found her diamond in the rough.

So in light of teaching lessons, and having really great skin, we set off on a night of rest, relaxation, and rejuvenation.  Enjoy the recipes below, they all worked fantastic!

First up?  Our face mask:

1/2 an avocado

1 T. crushed oatmeal (I crushed it with a mortar and pestle)

1 T. organic plain yogurt

1 tsp. honey

Next up?  Our face cleanser:

1 tsp. honey

2 T. cream

One mushed up kiwi

Can I just tell you my face was SO soft the next day!  We used regular face lotion that I already had, making lotion is a little more labor intensive than we had time for!

The recipe for our foot scrub:

1 C. sugar

2 to 3 drops of Jasmine essential oil

2 T. coconut oil (I warmed this up in the microwave, just a teeny bit, not enough to melt, just enough to soften it)

Then mix it all together. This by far was my favorite of the recipes, and my feet never looked so good the next day. And let me tell you my feet take a beating in flip flops and bare feet all summer long, usually I hide them under socks all winter!

Our little tray of yummies to begin our spa night.  A neck warmer, nail polish for manicures and pedicures with glitter (my daughter is teaching me a lot about glitter these days and I am eating it up), night cream, lotion, and heel scrub.  I also set up a basin of warm water in the living room and towels to wipe our faces after each step.

We started with a foot soak in warm water and Himalayan Rose Mineral Salts.  Then we applied our foot scrub and rinsed our feet in the soak.

What was surprising to me, and quite endearing, was that my daughter wanted to do everything I did to her to me.  So sweet.

Mama with the mask and cucumbers.  For the sake of your face I just thought I should share that it is helpful if you bring the cucumbers to room temperature first…brrr….

So there it is.  A glimpse into our spa evening.  We listened to meditation music, had tea, and finished up the evening watching a movie that I could barely stay awake during since I had become so relaxed.

I encourage you to try this at home with your little princesses or for yourself!  Remind yourself how worth it you are to take some time away to give yourself a pedicure, a manicure, a real facial.  Your spirit will love you for it.

If you remember my guest post over at Get Born on New Year’s Eve, you’ll recall that there were so many things about this year that had me yearning to delve deeply into my own life to extract that which would allow me to live fully, with zest, with fervor, with whimsy.  2012 and I were going to go head to head over the best me, and I was going to win.

This from a woman who has spent most of her adult life with anxiety.  Self doubt is the favorite form of self loathing.  It comes in many forms over many days.  I often questioned whether I was loved, cared about, valuable, important, worth it, putting on too much weight, was I forever too chatty in group gatherings or not chatty enough, I could wake up with headaches wondering if I offended anyone, I could lay down to sleep with worried mind that I didn’t get enough done in a day to make myself happy, my children happy, and my husband happy.  Am I living a full, FUN life?  Could I be approaching everyday with more awareness, more creativity, more engagement?  THIS life is enough, but what if I could live it with with more zest, more playfulness, more joy?  I eat to fill the void that every one of those questions left behind…a truth I no longer want to live with.

Where on earth was I going to begin finding this spiced up version of myself I like to hide?  Oh, yes, I was going to begin finding her playing along with Tiffani over at freeplaylife.  This is a gal whose adventures I have followed on Facebook for a couple of years all the while yearning to understand how I could get a little more of her spunk into my frump.

She is doing a 52 week challenge this year to create a better you, so to speak.  A few weeks ago her challenge was to put a picture of ones ASS onto Facebook, instagram, or some other form of expression where you were willing to show that fantASStic, fabulASS, bombASStic, part of yourself that most of us spend our days trying desperately to hide.

What did I think when I first read her challenge? Yeah, right.  There is no way on God’s green beautiful earth I was going to put a picture of my boot-ay out there for all the world to see.  Except then I starting thinking that maybe I could.  That maybe, it wasn’t that big of a deal.  And that maybe the journey to learning to love myself would be full of discomfort, but a little bit of excitement too.  And what if I could be artsy about it, and reflect a part of myself?

And then last week at my women’s circle gathering we talked about death. A lot.  Near death.  And the looming  journey of one very brave young lady, and the possibility of many young ladies I know.  There is no one here to stop time for us to finally figure out that there is nothing to be afraid of inside of our own divine selves.

So damn it, I did it.

And yesterday I posted it to Facebook.  Not without any fear mind you.  I actually started enjoying my homemade photo shoot, but when it was time to press the ‘share’ button I was sweating like a stuck pig on a 110 degree day in Texas.  At the last minute I thought against it.  And then shared my ass anyway.

Cause here is the kicker, I am tired of caring about what people think, I am tired of worrying if I said the right thing, did the right thing, am the right thing.  I am tired of hiding who I want to be behind fear and the stories I tell myself of why I am not good enough.  And lord knows I am tired of eating my way through all of my self depreciating bullshit lies.

I am amazing.  And so is my ass.  And so is yours.  And so are you.

Don’t ever forget it.  Or doubt it.  Or let anyone else tell you otherwise.

If you want to play along this year, join the freeplaylife Facebook page or rss feed to her blog.

I leave you today with one of her other assignments, to find your super hero song for the year.  My year?  Self love.  My super hero song? Nothing but Michael, press play, and then yes, you can totally get up and shake your ass along.